There’s a moment many teachers recognise. A student who used to raise their hand is now sitting quietly. A confident child begins asking, ‘May I go to the washroom?’ as soon as group work starts. Someone’s attendance slips from Monday to Wednesday, then a full week. When you finally ask, softly, ‘Kya masla hai?’ you often get the same answer: ‘Nothing, miss/sir. Bas… aise hi.’
In our schools across Pakistan, bullying rarely arrives as a clear headline. It shows up like a fog: small comments, private jokes, class WhatsApp groups, a nickname that becomes a label, a photo edited and shared, a voice note forwarded ‘for fun.’ The child keeps going to school, but something inside them stops feeling safe.
And that’s the real issue: bullying isn’t only about a bad moment. It’s about a student’s sense of safety, belonging, and izzat.
What Bullying Looks Like Here (Offline + Online)
In my classroom and while mentoring teachers, I’ve noticed bullying in Pakistan often wears ‘normal’ clothing:
- He’s just teasing.
- Boys will be boys.
- She’s too sensitive.
- It’s only a meme.
But research keeps reminding us: bullying is not a one-time conflict. It’s repeated harm, tied to power, social status, physical strength, popularity, money, language, looks, and even academic ranking. UNESCO frames it as a major barrier to safe learning and student well-being, and stresses that “punishment-only” responses often fail to address the root problem. (UNESCO Documentation)
In Pakistan, studies show that bullying is not rare. For example, a school-based study from Lahore reported substantial bullying experiences among students, with verbal and humiliating remarks common. (ResearchGate) And when teachers in Pakistan are asked about what they observe, they report seeing more social and verbal bullying than cyberbullying, suggesting that online harm may be happening “under the radar,” beyond adult sightlines. (PLOS)
Cyberbullying: Same Wound, Faster Spread
Cyberbullying hits differently because it follows a child home. A classroom comment ends after the bell; a screenshot doesn’t.
Recent Pakistani research on secondary school students links cyberbullying with psychological distress and lower self-esteem. (Journal of Social Sciences Review) And studies in Pakistan also highlight cyberbullying’s serious mental health impact in young people (including university students), especially when victims don’t know where to report or fear blame. (ResearchGate)
When I talk to students, the fear is rarely ‘I’ll get hurt.’ It’s:
- Everyone will see it.
- My parents will find out and stop using my phone.
- The teacher will announce it, and I’ll look weak.
So, they stay quiet, and silence becomes the bully’s best teammate.
The Teacher Awareness Gap (And Why It’s Not ‘Teacher Bashing’)
Here’s an uncomfortable truth I’ve seen in staff rooms too: many adults still don’t feel trained to identify bullying early, especially relational bullying (exclusion, rumour-spreading) and cyberbullying.
A 2025 study on interventions in Pakistan points to gaps in teachers’ knowledge and preparedness to reduce bullying. (Assa Journal) Another peer-reviewed paper documents that educator practices exist, but that structured, evidence-based school-wide interventions remain limited and understudied in Pakistan. (Taylor & Francis Online)
This is not about blaming teachers. It’s about admitting something simple:
- We were trained to teach subjects.
- We were not trained enough to handle peer cruelty, especially digital cruelty.
So, we fall back on what feels ‘manageable’:
- scolding,
- public warnings,
- forcing apologies,
- telling the victim to ‘ignore.’
But bullying doesn’t end with volume. It ends through systems.
What Bullying Does to a Student (Beyond Sadness)
Bullying messes with three things students need to learn: attention, trust, and confidence.
UNESCO and UNICEF both note that school violence and bullying are linked with anxiety, fear, reduced learning quality, and longer-term harm. (UNICEF) WHO also reminds us that adolescent mental health is already a global concern; environments that amplify stress can push vulnerable students into deeper distress. (World Health Organisation)
In real classroom terms, bullying often shows up as:
- sudden academic decline (not laziness overload),
- school avoidance,
- irritability or shutdown,
- ‘angry child’ labelling (when it’s actually pain),
- friendship instability,
- constant self-comparison.
Sometimes the bullied child becomes a bully later because power feels like protection.
School Response in Pakistan: What Usually Happens (And What Should Happen)
What I commonly hear is:
- We called both kids and told them to say sorry.
- We suspended the bully.
- We informed parents and ended it.
But bullying is rarely a two-person story. It’s a peer culture story. If bullying is recurring, it’s not just a student behaviour problem. It’s a school environment problem.
So, what does a stronger response look like, one that involves parents and administrators?
A Practical, School-Friendly Anti-Bullying Approach (Pakistan-Ready)
1) A clear policy that students actually understand
Not a ‘file’ on a website. A living agreement.
Some Pakistani schools publish safeguarding and anti-bullying policies that include reporting routes and parent-student orientation. Even when a school has one, the key is implementation and awareness. (lgs.edu.pk)
Minimum policy basics:
- What bullying is (with examples: group exclusion, fake accounts, photo-sharing),
- What happens when it’s reported,
- Confidentiality rules (no public shaming),
- Timelines (when parents are contacted),
- Consequences + support (for victim, bully, and bystanders).
2) A Reporting System That Protects ‘Izzat’
If reporting leads to embarrassment, students won’t report.
Try:
- a simple online form/drop box,
- a trusted staff member list (‘safe adults’),
- anonymous option with follow-up pathways.
3) Teacher Training That Focuses on Early Signs
Train teachers to notice:
- shifting seating patterns,
- who gets interrupted, laughed at, excluded,
- ‘quiet compliance’ (a big red flag),
- class group chat patterns (students can describe, without exposing everything publicly).
Research from Pakistan suggests teachers may under-detect cyberbullying compared to what students report, so training must include the online layer too. (PLOS)
4) Parent Involvement Without Panic
Parents often react in two extremes:
- Ignore it.
- I will go to the school and sort it out.
Schools can guide parents into a calmer middle:
- Listen first, don’t interrogate,
- Save evidence (screenshots),
- Avoid blaming the child (‘Why were you online?’),
- Coordinate a plan with the school.
UNICEF has also emphasised the need for collective action against online harassment and bullying in Pakistan’s context. (UNICEF)
5) Administrator Leadership: The ‘System Signal’
Students watch what leadership tolerates.
Admins should:
- Track incidents (patterns, hotspots, repeat offenders),
- Ensure consistent consequences (not based on influence),
- Protect privacy,
- Assign a safeguarding focal person/team.
6) Support + Accountability (Not Only Punishment)
Consequences matter. But so does repair:
- counselling support for targets,
- behaviour plans for perpetrators,
- guided restorative conversations only when safe,
- bystander education (because ‘forwarding’ is participation).
7) Digital Safety + Legal Awareness (Without Fear-Mongering)
Pakistan’s PECA 2016 covers certain online harassment behaviours and provides legal pathways, but many families and students don’t know what applies or how to seek help. (National Accountability Bureau)
A school can do a simple “digital boundaries” session:
- Consent before sharing photos,
- What to do if someone threatens,
- How to block/report,
- When adults must step in.
A Closing Reflection (From One Educator to Another)
Bullying is not a ‘phase’ we should normalise. It is a lesson students learn about power. If a child learns, “Adults won’t protect me,” they don’t just lose confidence in school; they also lose confidence in adults. They lose confidence in relationships, in community, sometimes in themselves.
But if a child learns, ‘I can report, and I’ll be heard,’ school becomes what it should be: a safe place to growAnd maybe that’s our real work beyond grades.
Not just teaching children how to speak. But building a culture where they don’t have to stay chup to survive.
Reading Resources
- Bullying data and global monitoring (UNICEF Data) (UNICEF DATA)
- UNESCO: school violence and bullying, and recommended whole-school actions (UNESCO Documentation)
- Pakistan-focused research: teacher perspectives on bullying and cyberbullying (PLOS ONE, 2023) (PLOS)
- Teacher awareness/intervention gaps (Pakistan-based study, 2025) (Assa Journal)
- Cyberbullying psychological impacts on Pakistani secondary students (2025) (Journal of Social Sciences Review)
- Pakistan law reference: Prevention of Electronic Crimes Act (PECA) 2016 (National Accountability Bureau)